Shelter from the Storm

This blog is inspired by the loss of my grandma..My "Ma" who taught me everything I know about love life and laughter..this is my journey with loss love life and laughter................ "Most of the time I'm clear focused all around, Most of the time I can keep both feet on the ground, I can follow the path, I can read the signs, Stay right with it when the road unwinds, I can handle whatever I stumble upon. I don't even notice she's gone, Most of the time...."

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Its been a year

Memorial day loomed in my mind for weeks,I did not want this day to arrive because it marked One Year since she left us.I knew their was no way to avoid it but in my daydreams,I hoped I would somehow sleep through it or at least dodge that impending feeling of doom that gripped me each time I saw any mention of this day.I wanted it to rain,I felt like if it didnt I would feel guilty for laying in bed all day as I planned.

I didnt sleep through it,it didnt rain like I had wished it would and I didnt lay in bed all day gripped in gloom,rather it was a beautiful day filled with sunshine and love,just as she would have wanted it to be.

I miss her terribly,a light went out in my heart when she left us and I often feel the darkness but in that darkness I have found a different life,maybe not the one I would choose but one that honors all she taught me.

Memorial Day is a holiday that celebrates Our Heroes,She is and was my Hero and I carry her heart in my heart.

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i carry your heart with me by E. E. Cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)

i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)

i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows(here is the root of the root and the bud of the budand the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which growshigher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

"My darling girl, when will you understand that 'normal' isn't necessarily a virtue. It rather denotes a lack of courage."

Practical Magic

But while the earth has slumbered,
all the air has been alive with feathery flakes descending.

- Henry David Thoreau

What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of the buffalo in the wintertime. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and looses itself in the sunset.

- Crow Foot

Nature! We are surrounded and embraced by her–
Incapable of escaping and incapable of delving deeper into her.
Without invitation or warning, she brings us into the rhythm of
her dance and sweeps onward with us, until we are exhausted
and fall from her arms.
- J.W.Goethe

"Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each..."

Henry David Thoreau

"Leave it to me as I find a way to be...Consider me a satellite, forever orbiting...I knew all the rules, but the rules did not know me...Guaranteed..."

Eddie Vedder

"Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns..."

George Eliot

"Sometimes when you're most alone... you're not alone at all"

Rob Machado, The Drifter

"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun."

Chris McCandless

Hold on to what is good,Even if it's a handful of earth.

Hold on to what you believe,Even if it's a tree that stands by itself.

Hold on to what you must do,Even if it's a long way from here.

Hold on to your life,Even if it's easier to let go.

Hold on to my hand,Even if someday I'll be gone away from you.

" Hold On," ....A Pueblo Indian Prayer